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Beebigrupid

Beebigrupid

Enne kui ma rasedaks jäin olin ma kindel, et mitte kunagi ei liitu ma ühegi beebigrupiga, sest need kohad pole päris normaalsed. Kuna viimasel ajal olen ma nii palju negatiivset nende kohta lugenud, siis tahtsingi just sellest täna natuke rääkida, sest ka mina olen ühe grupi liige. Või noh alguses olin lausa kahe grupi liige, aga ühest lahkusigi sellepärast, et see oli konkreetne ussipesa.

Üks päev sõbranna näitas mulle oma gruppi ja ma olin ikka väga üllatunud, mis seal toimus. Grupi loojal on vist võim pähe löönud, sest kõik peab käima tema taktikepi järgi. Kui kellegi arvamus tema omaga ei ühti, siis visatakse see inimene lihtsalt grupist välja. Eriti kütavad kirgi mähkmed (ainult öko ja kallis on ok, Pampers on ju keemiapomm), kandekotid (BB kott on parim ja ergonoomilised kotid on ajupesu ning vaid lollidelt raha ära võtmine), lamamistoolid (kes see üldse oma last lamamistooli paneb???) ja toit (annad oma lapsele RPA/poest ostetud püreesid? RONGAEMA).

Näiteks postitas inimene sinna gruppi pildi, kus nad käisid matkal ja viiekuune laps oli BB kotiga kaasas. Kõik kiitsid takka kui armas pilt ja üldse nii tublid, et sellise tegevuse beebiga koos ette on võtnud, AGA siis üks ema julges mainida, et kandekoti valik pole just kõige parem ning soovitas mõnda muud proovida. Mitte ühestki otsast polnud tegu negatiivse kommentaaariga ja see ema väga ilusti seletas, miks see pole hea jne. Selle asemel, et suhtuda asja mõistlikult, läks taaskord lahti sõda – küll õeldi, et koguaeg on beebisid sellistest kottides kantud ja nad on ok ning ega neid kotte muidu ei tehtaks kui need poleks head, küll õeldi, et pole vaja oma negatiivsust pritsida ja asi lõppes sellega, et ilmselgelt on see inimene, kes soovitas paremat kandekotti, lihtsalt kade, et tal sellist kotti pole. Appi! Päriselt ka? Kui see oleks mina olnud selle ema asemel, siis ma oleks küll tänulik, et keegi juhib minu tähelepanu asjale, mida ma varem ei teadnud. Ma ei võtaks sellist asja kuidagi solvanguna vaid olekski lihtsalt tänulik, et keegi mu silmad avas. Jah, nii palju kui on erinevaid inimesi, on ka erinevaid arvamusi, kuid kui minu arvamus kellegagi ei ühti, siis ma ei lähe ju seda talle peale suruma, siis miks osad siiski arvavad, et nende arvamus see ainuke ja õige on? Kui sul pole midagi head/tarka õelda, siis milleks üldse midagi õelda?

Veel olen ma tähendanud, et kui inimene teeb midagi ebasobivat, näiteks annab oma kuuekuusele proovida sefiiritorti, siis negatiivselt kommenteerijatele põhjendavad nad seda sellega, et aga vanasti tehti/anti ka ja näe ta on ju elus. “See oli vaid nii väike tükk, et ta pole sellest midagi saanudki”  – seda enam, miks sa siis üldse talle seda proovida annad kui see nii väike amps oli ja ta sellest midagi ei saa? Miks see siis andmata ei võiks jääda, kui ta sellest midagi ei saa ju? Seega väide, et vanasti anti/tehti ka ei ole väga pädev. Jah, vanasti olidki paljud asjad teisiti, aga kõik areneb, elu liigub edasi, inimesed saavad targemaks ja luuakse paremaid, mugavamaid ja beebisõbralikumaid asju. Selle asemel, et oma silmaringi avardada (ja et su beebi saakski vaid parimat), ollakse kinni mingites vanades piirides.

Üks asi, mis mind veel pisut kukalt paneb kratsima on minisünnipäevade suursugune tähistamine. “Jagage kontakte, kellelt tellida järgmiseks kuuks tort!” – kas see pisut ülepingutatud pole? Laps on nagunii alles nii väike ja tema sellest koogist rõõmu ei tunne, siis miks peab see olema mingi eriti uhke ja spetsiaalselt valmistatud? Jah, me ka tähistame sünnipäevi, aga kordagi pole ma ekstra tellinud seda kooki kuskilt. Mõnikord küpsetan ise või kui lähen Juuniori sünnipäeval poodi ja juhtun koogiletist mööda minema ning midagi mind seal kõnetab, siis jah ikka ostan kooki, aga kui pole midagi isuäratavat, siis pole midagi katki ka.

Rääkides nüüd sellest grupist, kus mina olen, siis meie väike novembrikate grupp on suurepärane. Päriselt ka! Inimesed on mõistlikud, keegi ei kisu riidu ja ei suru peale oma arvamust. On arutelud ja inimesed annavad nõu/soovitusi, jagatakse pilte, rõõme ja muresid – kõik jääb gruppi. Mul on küll väga hea meel, et liitusin sellise grupiga, sest seal on koos minuga sarnases olukorras inimesed. Jah, sa saad rääkida ka oma elukaaslase/sõbranna/emaga sellest kõigest, aga see pole see, sest nad ei ole äsja sünnitanud ja nad ei ole 24/7 beebiga koos. Mina soovitan küll liituda sellise grupiga, kus on samaealised beebid koos ja kui sul läheb õnneks ning satud heasse gruppi, siis leiad sealt mõttekaaslasi ja sõbrannasid 🙂

Millised kogemused on teil beebigruppidega?


Tags assigned to this article:
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  24. Kadi
    Kadi 4 September, 2017, 13:05

    Esimese lapsega olen ka siis tema sünnikuu grupis. Liitusin sellega alles siis, kui laps oli 3-kuune. Ma lihtsalt ei tulnud sellepeale, et grupiga liituda Isegi,kui teised rääkisid, ma ei tulnud 😀 See grupp on väga mõnus ja kokkuhoidev. Jah, seal on kogu see suur grupp ja pole ussitamisi ega midagi. Mul isegi kahju, et ei liitunud koheselt. Nüüd olen uue lapse ootel ja ma pole jõudnud eriti rase ollagi, kui see uus grupp ussitab. Kahju on tegelikult tõdeda, et nendeks pritsijateks on tavaliselt inimesed, kes pole ise asjadest eriti teadlikud või just “vanasti tehti”. Mul käivad külmavärinad üle, kui keegi toob jälle selle vabanduseks. Jaa nendele paarile asjale, millele sa tähelepanu pöörasid, on minu mõtted samad. Edu sulle selle pisikese särasilma kasvatamisel 🙂

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  25. merilin
    merilin 4 September, 2017, 11:58

    mina olen juuli beebid 2017 grupi liige ja olen ka väga rahul.inimesed on toretad.kui on mure siis aitavad jne. 🙂

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